5.

done with the past
fresh start...
is all i need
because i see the beauty
i fear the dark
but wish the sunrise and the sunset to make their imapact
i worship the ground
and devote to the sky
you see straight through the lie
i applud you

4.

forever lost in the sea of emotions
never gaining to speed on on depth
just floating in the confusion

the anger is noticeable
the strenght is weakening
ablity to hold on?
gone !



you were the one that broke me
now it break 'it'

3.

shoulder to shoulder
breather on skin
kiss so tender
or did i forget
are you truely there? the person i think you are
do they even notice the peson i am now
or it covered amd smothered in the past
i wish not to continue this outing
id rather bath in the warmth of something real
not the illusion of what has been

2.

that dream
its haunted me all day
to what i was saw
to feel how i felt
that moment was more real than any of todays activites

im not someone you can play
neither am i a pawn in your game
i wish the world happieness
i wish myself contentment
but the pain you cause
breaks my very skin

never again?

1.

your eyes glaze over
your touch once soft now scrapes my skin
the wall impossible to climb
the thought of you?
no longer are mine

since then i now wish to disconnect
failing to see the forward
scared to admit the truth

you have no more to offer
om sorry

that night

the rush of emotion of as you stand
you know whats way to to happen
as they enter the stage
as they play the fisrt note
the buzz is incredible and you cant handle the emotion anymore
you cant take the heat
the frenze
just enjoy the moment
you know you have to
when will you get this feeling again
pure happiness
when your brusied and sweaty
dancing like no ones watching
and just like that it over ... till next time

indifferent

music fills my head but onely encorages the screaming
the words just melt into my ideals
they prmote the thinking i'd rather forget
im forgetting to tell you how i really feel
but i believe
you are chosing to ignore this anyways

if you put the thought abou how much i care to the back of your head no one will get hurt
i use to laugh at people in my this situation
snigger 'how could they be so stupid'
'why dont they walk away'
well if im truthfully ... walking away would break me more than you could

goodbye

its time to forget
only me and you know what was
only me an you know the truth
even if you hide from it
i cant keep the touture going
i dont want to seeyour arms round her
and you dont want to see the arms around my waist belonging to him

im happy in a way that i never thought i could be again
your just the bad drug
and i will get you out my system even if it involves forgetting your name
the way you taste
and he way you smell
thwe hardest part
...
your the olny obne to to see straight into to me
thats what hurt
we were always so close
nether strong enough
to broken to see the future

id love to think outr paths will crosss again
but they only will if either of us force it
im not strong enough to let you reject me again
to break my heart again?
whats one more time ...


so this is goodbye
farewell for now at least
ill see what happens when im more stabble
maybe when you forget me we can start
or end again!


so this goodbye
this is farewell
i want to state ill never think about you again
i want to state that ill neer get in contact
but its you and you know my strenght
and your the weakness i cant over come

but for now .... Get Fucked!
hold her!
but you know she will never be me
goodbye

you

its funny how the one thing i hate most athat girls do
when they tunr into 'that person'
i feel myself doing the same
im as bad as all the rest
and starting to understand its not as easty as it looks to be the good guy 24/7


...
i dunno what i want anymore
or who i want to be

and again

tears run dry
all thats left is laughter
how stupid you've been
how meaningless this whole experience has been
anfd how you still managed to break me a little

i repeat the words hoping one day they will have an impact on your life to
hpoing that one day im right and they have to state how wrong they are
you know what i want to hear
you know what i need but still wont give me what i want
im sick fed up
why am i only right about the things i truely dont want to be right about ...

contentment

its so sad to think the things all i need to make me happy






but i wont tell the world just yet...

nothings simpler

magic circles seperate us all
your breathe still makes the hairs on her neck stick up
your eyes still calm her down
that one touch and her stomach does summersaults

the lyrics fill her head
and she dreams of a simpler time
they ask why she still bothers with you
there is no answer that will please them
but her true friends understand and pick her up when you forget to hold her up

she doesnt ask for everything
or much at all

but do you remember
that first...
the contement of sitting there
entangled and smiling
each with a book in their hand
each happy just to be with each other


simpler time?
or an experience that needs to be a daily activity?

I MISS YOU!

ok i've said it, i've whipered, i've screamed it...

but when will you realise the main problem ...

its not whats happened
its not what could happen
its not the pain
its not the mistakes
its not you ...

don't you get it?












ill never be good enough for you



and if you wont admit it i sure as hell will

all i feel is numb

!

im listening to that song again
you know one ...
oh wait you dont know what it is
you dont know what it symbolises

yes i hear it and think about you and her and how everything you said or did was erased cause you broke it

options

turning at the crossroads
broken on the street
missing the intervals
and forgetting where to speak

'i miss you' has long been said but not yet forgotton
your touch is not something i regret
but chose not to remember as my skin would start to ache for you
as much as my heart does

you told me you didnt
but to me the fact you wanted to is so much worse
the thought can mean so much more
and the fact you tired to and failed
so yes now his hands are on me
but don't for for second think that it wasnt you who put them there...

realisation

new slate
that new day ive been dreaming of is coming closer
the grounnd beneath my feet will change
the faces i see each day will no longer be the same

and yet what will really change?
when will i realise i cant run from my demons
insecurites
curel words
lost dreams
broken promises
the ones the you lost long the way

you can take yourself away from the place but can you ever truely forget your past?

today

you see right through the soul i cant offer,
you worship the unspoken ground
and then you kiss me and i cant help but want nothing more!

whats happening to this situation? do you understand ?
theres so much i cant explain
and don't wish to

but then all is calm and the future is forward

again

the truth realised
the barrier broken
no where left to hide
no where left to run

you lips fit mine perfectly
and you arms hold me close
but ive thought these thoughts before
the feleings feel brand new

i just like how easily you can make me smile..

you never knew

to scared to make the step as your not strong enough to catch up with my broken mistakes
to lost to realise yours are the arms i belong in
and we got so lost than no one told us to stand back

questions

im starting to consider that every person is a mixture of the last
every 'new' person you meet reminds you of someone
these people may be out of your life
better forgotten
lost along the way
desperate to have with you but you cant
but to be reminded of them by this 'new' person is that not unfair on the original person or the newer version?
do those charcteristics not have some right to be person you noticed them in first?
and with this logic
this person you once loved
and you loved them for the way the spoke about the world or the way they held you
what if the next person comes along and does the exact same without realising
should you run from the 'new' person because their ruining the image of the last
or should you stay and ruin image of new as your alway going remember who came first
but if you do run will you be running from a possiblity or a certainty?

so many questins and no one really has a clear idea how to solve the issuses
we are all broken as the last

i cant explain it clearer

shadowed by the fears of yesterday
and the pain tomorrow may cause
so much haterd from someone who i cant help but still miss
moved on with my life but yu have taken part of me with you

confidence taken a hit
prettending to be that person i wanna be
and yet ill aadmit straight away who i am
not to get those happy compliments
just to honest
i am who i am
and being scared of what i look like is my biggest downfall

truth

you dont see it yet do you?


your copmletely lost!
and i refus to pick you up this time...

!

the new paragragh is long overdue to be written
the next chapter has been put on hold for far too long
what is she waiting for?
no one will take that step for her
and her safety net is unawre of its purpose

she understands how she is meant to feel
she sees how they want to see her
and the image of herself through their eyes
all these things would make any girl complete
but like like so many otheres shes haunted by her past

she cant get past her deamons
move past the days that broke her
shes made the choice
to leave this god for sken place and start again!